Rhien: No, no. She is the one who has spent an hour and a half getting ready to go out, and then she made the mistake of walking into the Newsroom. It's like, "You are in the wrong place, gal." We always get the dirty art kids in here. They just wipe off the stink and pull on a pair of jeans, and they're done, you know?

Rhien: Another good one is the drunk chick with no inhibitions.

Matt: Yeah, that's a pretty big turn-on. The one downside to that, though, is that this is a 3 a.m. bar, and it's really hard to get a drunk chick to stay until 4 o'clock. If I could change anything, I would change it to a 1:30 bar.

Rhien: I don't think I'm a man of many morals, necessarily, but I don't really wanna be that guy who drops a girl off and the next day, she's like, "Who are you again?"

How often have you picked up in here?

Rhien: Well, I was doing pretty well there for a while, and then I met my girlfriend. I've been with her for a year and a half. But not as much as I'd like. My girlfriend hates it when I bring a chick home anymore. Sometimes I have to be like, "Sorry, honey, we're fuckin' her." But sometimes she's cool with it, or she'll just sleep through it.

Matt: I've had some success.

Rhien: The first time for him was this girl that I'd been railin' for a little while. She was in here, drunk, and I wasn't here. So Matt went up to her, knowing that she thought he was me, and Matt said, "Do you want to come to my place and take a shower?"

Matt: She was all like, "I'm really hot." So I said, "Do you want to come to my place and take a shower? Will that help?" I did feel really bad the next day, though.

So you guys pull the switch?

Rhien: Just that one time. He actually pulled the switch, though. I don't actually do the switch.

Matt: But I think that if a girl said, "Hey, do you guys both want to come [home with me]?" we'd be in on it.

Being brothers, that doesn't bother you?

Rhien: Why would it?

Matt: We were naked in the womb together.

What would you make a woman to put her in the mood?

Rhien: Some sort of alcoholic smoothie with, like, dark chocolate and asparagus.

Matt: And stir it with my wiener.

Rhien: No, that comes later. Maybe get the massage going, maybe breathe in her ear a little bit.

How do you tell when a woman is in the mood?

Matt: When she keeps looking down.

Rhien: When she looks sleepy.

What's the greatest word in the English language?

Matt: Cunnilingus.

You wasted no time saying that.

Matt: For the longest time, I was like, "What the hell does that mean?" And then I found out, and I was like, "Oh, wow. I never expected that."

Rhien: He just thought it meant great —  like, "My coffee is so cunnilingus this morning."

KC's Prophylactic Past

Back in the day, Kansas City was known as the home of Peacocks.

By CHARLES FERRUZZA

Veteran newscaster Walt Bodine remembers the popularity of Peacock-brand condoms back in the 1930s. Bodine was working at his father's all-night drugstore at Linwood and Troost. "Men were a little sheepish about asking for rubbers early in the day," he said. "But as the night went on, they lost their inhibitions. And since we were open 24 hours and surrounded by apartment hotels, the later it got, the more rubbers we sold."

And it wouldn't have been hard to restock the shelves. Kansas City, it seems, was once the headquarters for Peacock rubbers. It was a heady time for Prohibition-snubbing Kansas City — and for condoms.

But it wasn't always that way. In 1000 B.C., Egyptian men employed tubes of fine linen to protect their peckers from infection or unwanted pregnancies. By the 19th century, a frisky farmer or a randy rancher could make his own condom with a sheep's intestine, following this recipe (as quoted in Reay Tannahill's Sex in History): "Soak it first in water, turn it on both sides, then repeat the operation in a weak ley (solution) of soda, which must be changed every four or five hours, for five or six successive times; then remove the mucous membrane with the nail; sulphur, wash in clean water, and then in soap and water; rinse, inflate and dry. Next cut it to the required length and attach a piece of ribbon to the open end."

The convenience of prepackaged, easy-to-use condoms changed sex in America when the first commercially produced rubbers were introduced to consumers in 1855. These early prophylactics were expensive, though, and hard to find.

Interest in condoms exploded when soldiers returning from World War I brought sexually transmitted diseases back with them. By the 1930s, almost every U.S. drugstore sold inexpensive, thin, single-use rubbers.